If I Had A Dollar

So I was daydreaming today, thinking about all the times of my life. Pictures from my past quizzed my memory like flashcards on my personal history. I laughed, I teared, I sighed, but mostly, I just wished I had a dollar for every time I uttered these phrases:

Welcome to Burger King. May I take your order?
No, you don’t look fat. That skirt/hairstyle/swimsuit is cute on you.
He’s a jerk.
I took a bath yesteday, Mama!
Yes, you can have my last piece of bacon, Son.
Will you sign my report card?
Do I look fat?
How adorable!
Try not to move. This may cause slight discomfort.
Be careful not to bite your lip, cheek, or tongue.
Are you serious?
I love football/baseball/basketball!
Can I use the car?
Here’s your change. Would you like a receipt?

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